Is yours killing your chances?

Darleen Proud | November 25, 2014 at 03:14

Internet dating profile

Internet dating profile…

Is yours killing your chances?

Writing your own online dating profile can be a daunting task. We are quite used to putting our best self forward on a resume or CV to get a job or promotion, but ask someone to write a positive, accurate, interesting couple of paragraphs about themselves as a person, and most of us freeze and go blank!

I know this from my own experience a few years ago. Having just gone through a tumultuous 8 months of breakup, moving interstate, and getting a new job… online dating seemed like a better way to meet someone than spending time at clubs and pubs… I was in my late 30’s then.

Be interesting and relevant

When you sit down to write your first profile, make sure you engage the help of a good friend or sibling to check it for you. Write about you as a person now, not what you have done in the last 10-20 years. If all you have to say is that you work, watch TV, eat takeaway and sleep, who do you think is going to be attracted to you and want to spend time with you? Someone who is the same, most likely. If you are a more adventurous soul, and have 15 things on every week end, you may say 3-4 of them, and that your life revolves around your activities… on the other hand if you are this busy will you be able to make time to spend with someone? Use a current, clear, head shot for your main photo.

Be honest!

Be positive, and don’t lie about anything. If you are 168cm tall, don’t say you are 175cm. these things are pretty obvious on the first meeting, and if you can’t be honest in the very first instance, how can you expect a potential new relationship opportunity to trust and respect you? If you are a little shy or nervous, say so in your profile, vulnerability is human and endearing. If you love dogs and have 1 or more make sure that is in your profile, some potential dates may not like dogs at all.

Some dating websites give you the opportunity to ‘tick a box’ of desired physical features and personality traits. When putting in your stats, don't say you are a non- smoker if you still have a few on a Friday evening with drinks. Some things seem small to you and may be a deal breaker to others. I’m not suggesting you write a book on your life, but be specific and honest. If you are contacted by an interested party who has small children in their life and that is a deal breaker for you, don’t take it any further.

To give you an idea, the simplest comment can have an impact … a story was shared with me about one lady who was looking for a relationship online. She received a message from a guy. Reading his profile, his closing comment was … must love champagne! That comment alone got her attention. Having this same love for champagne, they had a date testing various types and shared their opinions. So, don’t overcomplicate the process.

Cheers

Darleen

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